Will You Go on a Date with Me? Predicting First Dates from Linguistic Traces in Online Dating Messages

From conveying intimacy (“I like you”) to irritation (“stop messaging me!”) and dissatisfaction (“I don’t think we’ll work out”), language use plays a fundamental yet often overlooked role in the initiation of relationships. In online dating, daters exchange messages to determine how interested they are in a partner and whether they would like to go on a first date with them. In two studies, we examined whether linguistic features present in online dating messages can predict whether a first date took place. In Study 1, we identified five interpersonal processes related to first date outcomes: investment, interdependence, emotional dynamics, decision-making, and coordination. In Study 2, we tested our hypotheses generated from Study 1 on a new dataset. Our results suggest that certain linguistic features within online dating messages can be used to predict above chance the likelihood of going on a first date.